Edited: 21 September 2023
How we all doing out there trying to plan our weddings? I know, it’s hard.
Never fear though because I do have the answers for quite a few of the more common planning problems that pop up. So, take my advice and be proactive - use these tips and tricks to take back control and make your wedding planning experience the time of joy and happiness that it really should be. That way, you can focus on what's truly important: a weekend winery crawl with your besties. Oops, sorry! Of course what I meant was quality time celebrating with your fiancé!
PROBLEM: MISSING RSVP’s: If you get to your RSVP day and every single guest has replied already then consider yourself #blessed - you have the most considerate and organised guests a person could ask for! If there’s responses to chase it can often cause a knock-on effect where caterers are asking for final numbers and dietaries, and hire companies need to know how many chairs to deliver and you don’t have the answers, which is stressful to say the least.
SOLUTION: A variety of vendors are going to need your final guest count four weeks before the big day, so set your RSVP date for six weeks prior to give yourself some breathing space. And when that day comes, know it’s more than likely that you’ll have to simply start calling people with a polite speech that goes something like ‘Hey, I’m sure you don’t want to be stuck eating a sandwich on the floor at my wedding, so should I put you down as a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’?’
PROBLEM: KIDS OR ADULTS ONLY?: You would like an adults only affair, but you know your sister/bestie/whomever will not go anywhere without their kids.
SOLUTION: Much as I would like to say that this is not your problem and these people need to get over it, we all know that sometimes we have to bend a little in order to preserve a friendship, or avoid some drama. The easiest way around this is to hire a venue that has some accommodation on-site and hire a sitter to watch the kids. I’ve often managed weddings where this has been done and it works really well. The sitter can be someone known to the family (maybe a friend’s mother or similar) and they’ve been happy to play with the kids, set up a movie night, put them to bed when needed, etc, while the parents can check-in whenever they feel the need. We often ask the kitchen to send meals to the room also, to save trouble for everyone.
PROBLEM: PLUS-ONE’s: You’re bound to have a few singles on your guest list, but you can’t give them all a ‘plus-one’ because it adds up quick on your budget, and the maximum guests allowed at the venue.
SOLUTION: Extend the invitation for your guest to bring a partner only if it’s someone they’ve been dating for over a year (and you’ve met them), are engaged, or married. A blanket rule likes this makes it easy to decide who gets one, as well as easy to explain to anyone who asks.
PROBLEM: YOUR WEDDING DREAMS VS YOUR PARENTS: Let me say up front that I hear this from couples all the time, where parents are seen to be ‘interfering’ in plans or being too opinionated about it all. It’s not at all uncommon, but this is such a tough one to answer because every family is different.
SOLUTION: First of all, acknowledge that there is potentially a lot of complex emotions involved in why your parents are behaving this way, and promise yourself you’re going to try to tread carefully and be considerate of those feelings.
You’re definitely allowed to have your day play out exactly as you want it, I’m not disputing that for a second. But are there any elements you really don’t care about too much? They’re the ones you need to hand off in order to protect the elements you really do care about. Maybe your mum would be thrilled to take care of planning a dessert table for you, or your dad would love to take care of booking the wedding party’s transport. Give them something to do, make them feel important, thank them profusely and move right on.
PROBLEM: THE WAY-TOO-DRUNK GUEST: There will always be at least one guest that over-indulges just a little too much and although it normally wouldn’t bother you on a regular Saturday night, this is your wedding.
SOLUTION: If you know who this person is going to be, you can mitigate the effects ahead of time by asking an appropriate guest to keep an eye on them, and take responsibility for putting them in a cab home before they start propositioning Aunt Jemima, or dancing on the bar.
Another helpful tip is to have late-night snacks served around 10:30 pm, so that everyone isn't running solely on alcohol and sugar from the cake. Finger food like sliders or baskets of fries always go down well.
Planning a wedding can be a journey with a lot of uncertainties and outside influence that cause you stress. The best way to enjoy the entire journey is to recognise that not every step of the way will be exactly as you see it in your fave rom-com. Compromise, give a little, and roll with the smaller things as much as you can.
For the bigger things, you can rely on us! We have the answers to all the obstacles you could face along the way, and we have a process to follow that completely eliminates a lot of those things before they even happen. Fill out our Contact form here and let’s create a magical, fun-filled day together xo
